Traveling in the inner and outer worlds
Conny Larsson, soon 60 years of age, knows what it's like to be in the top end of the world of meditation when the emotions are young. He has been guru Mahesh Yogi Maharishi's private secretary and traveled with him around the world.
And the world-famous Beatles meditating in India hover here and there and over the text - almost all the chapters have a Beatles to record.
In this memoir one soon comes across meditation, into the breathing, the meditative state and listening closely when Conny Larsson was thirteen and heard Maharishi Mahesh Yogi in Stockholm. "My eyes could not get enough of him."
Conny Larsson later tried to become an actor "amid those who by nature created themselves to get contact with the higher spheres" He will meet Maharishi Mahesh Yogi again, feel that the theater is not the final destination, meditates more and more.
In the late 1960s he goes to India, lives in poverty, hears remarkable stories, returns to the the theater in Sweden, teaches meditation, and is attracted by the Maharishi Mahesh Yogi to new missions. It is hook or by crook, it is a luxury and poverty, there are strict orders and verbal abuse. Larsson completes it , is in the construction industry and more, is told that he must give away everything, starts a treatment home, goes to India again...
The journey begins and ends, ends and begins. This is an open-hearted book on wavering, of clarity, of hope - and in the long run not to tolerate superstition. And on a lot of grief where much dies, friends, ideals.
No, love in is not all you need.
Most of what is said with eagerness, as he must tell it, even when it's more than painful, even when the words must be forced out. He convinces me most when he tries to convince himself, such was the idea, such were the steps taken.
Towards the end - which is both a hello and an au revoir - he breathes faster, sits on the furthest outer branch, does not know whether it is the way back which is the way forward.
His entire body has been numbed, thoughts have come and gone, but now the emotions are there and they can no longer cheat.
And it is just in that most evident that when Conny Larsson writes, he can no longer be an actor.